I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that you would rather be happy than sad. As part of this, you would probably prefer to surround yourself with positive people versus individuals who are negative and possibly even a bit toxic to be around.
We all have the power to control what kind of energy we give off around our loved ones or what we bring home to them. Too many of us were exposed to poor habits and behavior growing up that we have brought into our adult lives and relationships. As real as that is, we have an obligation to learn better ways to deal with negativity, so our families don’t become our emotional punching bags.
It can be a bit tricky for men to understand as it can feel so good to get what is bothering us off our chests. We could have just had to endure a rougher than usual commute. That one co-worker might have annoyed us more than usual. Whatever it might be, we have an obligation to learn how to process these life frustrations before we puke them all over our wives, girlfriends, kids, etc.
I get it, it is tough to learn healthy ways to deal with frustrations. It is much easier to just complain and move on. The damage is how that negativity weighs down our loved ones when we take this easy way out.
Personally, I was terrible at this. I bet that most of the time that I came home, one of the first things that I did to my wife was unload my issues onto her. I only thought of myself and how I would feel afterwards. I didn’t understand how to handle these issues appropriately and I certainly didn’t consider the stress that I was adding to her.
I can reflect on these mistakes now, but it took some growth on my end to be able to do so.
What can you do to help buffer your family from negativity? That is the question that a man should be asking when he is trying to improve in this space.
Some believe that talking to other men about your day is a great outlet as guys can just be there for each other in this way. We’ve all heard about guys going to their local watering hole to do this however I’m not advocating drowning your troubles in alcohol.
Journaling is a popular outlet as well. When I first started hearing about journalling, I was very skeptical. Truth is that I still am a little bit, which is why I decided to start this blog. A great way to grow is to face a fear or challenge and hit it head on.
I’ve seen plenty of people encourage breathwork. Taking a deep breath or inhaling/exhaling in a certain pattern to help the negative energy pass through your body can help release the negativity that you might be feeling.
For me, altering my mindset about my day has been a huge help. I have found that recognizing a negative and not allowing it to stay with me has been my go-to method. I still acknowledge what I’m experiencing and that feeling but I don’t let it overtake me either.
I’ll be honest, this was not an easy thing for me to get. I was bad at absorbing energy from people around me, especially negative energy. I had to do a ton of work to get to a point where I handled these moments better. I’ll probably always have to be aware of this in myself but now that I have a better understanding, I feel that I can be a better man because of it.
Do you have a method of processing and handling negative energy? Was it something that I mentioned above or do you have another suggestion?
